Memories of Our Mother: Clara Pearl Astle Carling by Eva Carling Johnston

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Mom was pretty well for about four years and then the cancer returned and began to spread through her body. She tried several different drugs prescribed by the medical center doctors. Some of them made her very sick and one drug caused her to lose her hair, and she had to buy a wig. Eventually her pretty white hair grew back in and looked as good as ever. She commented at times that if it were just for herself she'd stop taking the drugs, but if they could learn something from her case that would help someone else, it would be worth what she had to endure.

Aunt Arstanie spent a lot of time with Mom during her last two years as she became weaker. It was comforting for Mom to have her there, and the family felt better knowing she was there. We'll always be grateful to her for her unselfish service. Mom insisted she would rather be at home than to be with one of us. She wanted to be independent as long as she possibly could. She was able to do this with Aunt Arstanie's help. Grant and Nola were so good to her, always calling or stopping by to check on her. She was very appreciative of their concern and also of the standing invitation to their house for Sunday dinner.

She still raised a garden and did some canning of peaches and apricots with Aunt Arstanie's help in 1973. She couldn't bear to have empty fruit bottles or to have anything go to waste, so she continued to do canning as long as she was able. She'd say, "Some of the kids can use it."

Even as she became weaker and weaker, she never did spend a lot of time in bed, but would doze on the couch. Grant insisted she have a long cord put on the phone so she could take it into the bedroom by her bed. It was a blessing to have the phone there early on the morning of June 1, 1974. She fell trying to get back into bed and broke her arm. Not wanting to disturb Grant at that early hour, she lay on the floor a long time, too week to get herself into bed. Just before 7:00 a.m., she finally called Grant to take her to the hospital. The next day she died peacefully in her sleep. It was Sunday afternoon, June 2, 1974.

After 73 years of hard work, sacrifice, and service to her family and fellowmen, she had gone to the rest she deserved. She had endured faithfully and patiently to the end.

- - - - -

Our mother was a good woman and as fine a mother as anyone ever had. Besides giving us strong, healthy bodies, she and Dad taught us how to be strong spiritually as well. She taught us by her example the importance of being honest, dependable, hardworking, obedient children.

She was always there when we needed her, and it seemed there was no problem she couldn't solve. After I left home, I could call her on the phone and she would patiently listen to my problems. She was always sympathetic and understanding, and she made you feel you could do no wrong. No one can ever take the place of your mother. She never interfered in our married lives or gave her advice unless you asked for it.

How do you adequately thank or pay tribute to your mother? I have come to the conclusion that the best and only way you can do it is to live the way she taught us, keep Heavenly Father's commandments, and to always live our lives in a way that she could always be proud of us.

Our mother's patriarchal blessing promised that she would be able to live a long life and be of much help to her children. She was much help and support to us all right to the end of her life. It seemed that she couldn't or wouldn't leave until everyone's problems were all settled. How blessed we were to have her so long.

These lines from the book of Proverbs seem to have been written about her:

vs. 27: She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness.

vs. 28: Her children arise up, and call her blessed: her husband also, and he praiseth her.

vs. 29: Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excellest them all.

vs. 30: Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a women that feareth the Lord, she shall be praised.

vs. 31: Give her of the fruit of her hands; and let her own works praise her in the gates.

(Proverbs 31: 27-31)

- Words of Wisdom -

As wise sayings are handed down from one generation to another, our mother taught them to us.

She used to tell us to plan our trips to the basement. For instance, when you go down for a bottle of fruit, stop to think if you need anything else at the same time so you don't have to take two trips. She'd say, "If you use your head, you'll save your heels."

On buttoning a sweater she'd say, "If you start right and keep right, you'll end right." This, of course, was good advice on how to live our lives as well.

How blessed we were to have had Clara Pearl Astle Carling for our mother!

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